I felt as if we were getting nowhere. Just waiting. Fortunately we have had such tremendous support! Friends and co-workers have been stopping by just about everyday and all day!
Friday and Saturday had been the same, just waiting for the surgeon this time.
The surgeon finally told us that they will perform the biopsy on Monday, to test the tissue.
I knew I had to go back to school, but I really didn’t want to. I just wanted to stay, and be physically there for her.
I felt like there was nothing I could do, and that I wasn’t helping at all. That my words or anything I did mattered, I just wanted to be….be with her.
Monday came around, I kept my phone glued to my hands to make sure I didn’t miss that call.
I waited and waited, and it killed me minute by minute.
Finally Mom called me and told me that everything went well!! I was glad, but still wished I was there and not at school. She told me that we had to wait some more for the biopsy report. Great.
I went on with my week, promised to return home that very weekend. I just wanted to be home right then.
Mom told me that even though family is important, it’s also important that I get my education, and to stay at school. I wanted to argue, but there was no use, she was right.
Thursday I found out that she had been discharged from the hospital again! It had been six days since she’s been home.
Baba’s cousin Mike and his wife, drove all the way from Florida to come see her!
Friday came, and just as promised I returned home! I thought I’d be happy to be home, but I was wrong. Our house was filled with bouquets of flowers, cards, and so much food. I felt as if I had just left a funeral, and entered the house of the mourners. In addition, we had company come in and out, bringing us food and more flowers. It broke my heart to pieces.
I had (and still do) so many burning questions, and it hurts me so much inside to just dwell on them. (So I won’t list what they are on here).
I told Mom exactly what I thought, (the after funeral thought), and she agreed; basically stating that that’s what it’s coming down to. I did not want to hear that, especially from her.